Don’t Stop the Party
I have had a number of new client meetings the last few weeks, and every time I tell a client they have to adjust their expenses, I get these responses:
Every single client looks at me as though I showed up to the party and took the punch bowl away, and what they don’t realize, is that I am not taking the punch bowl away, I’m just swapping out the punch.
Misconceptions on Frugality
I think a big misconception for people as they shift from spending mindlessly to a more frugal and fiscally responsible approach is that the fun as they know it will end. They really do believe that the party is going to stop, and who wants the party to stop when you are having fun?
I understand this apprehension in my clients because I was exactly the same way. I didn’t want anyone to tell me I couldn’t do something, especially if I had the money to do it. However, after years of adjusting my own mindset, what I realized is that I did have to stop one party so that I could start another one. I realize that I wasted too much time focused on the immediate party, that I didn’t think about the bigger and better party that I could have down the road.
Stop the Present Party for the Future Party
It’s hard to think about the future party, especially when it’s years away, but that’s exactly what we need to do. For me, my future party involves declaring financial freedom when my son graduates college. My future party involves a lifestyle filled with travel and location independence rather than working the grind of a job that holds me in one location; and my future party involves me choosing to work rather than having to work.
In order for me to attend my future party sooner than later, I have to miss some parties in the present. I have to say, though, that since I have skipped some present parties, I realize that my life is not less fun, it’s just a different kind of fun; and this is what I try to get my clients to understand.
It’s difficult for many of my clients at the beginning of their journeys to see that the party has not completely stopped, especially as they start to make choices they never did before like staying in and cooking dinner rather than going out with friends. However, my clients who have been on the journey for a few months and even years, realize that their future party looks even better than the parties they missed.
As their debt loads diminish and their bank accounts grow, they start to see the possibility of a party they didn’t think they could ever achieve, for some it’s home ownership, for others it’s the flexibility to change jobs, and this motivates them to stay on their fiscally responsible paths.
On Friday’s podcast, I am going to chat about a number of ways to have fun while staying financially responsible, but the best way to accept the present changes is to focus on the future fun. The more definition and clarity you can bring to your future party, the easier it will be for you to say no to present day parties.
No one loves a party more than me, so I guarantee you that if I can change the way I party, anyone can. It starts with prioritizing your future over your present and just changing the way you have fun rather than ending the fun completely.
Gif Source: giphy