The Money Talk
In this episode of Martinis and Your Money, I am talking to Lori Sackler, a senior vice-president and financial adviser at Morgan Stanley. In 2013, Lori authored the book, The M Word: The Money Talk Every Family Needs to Have About Wealth and Their Financial Future. Now she has released The M Word Journal: How to Have the Money Talk, a guide to use when having the money conversation in your family. Lori and I talk about our experiences working with clients and why we believe having the money talk is so difficult for people to have.
I personally love the journal Lori created to help give you a framework for the money talk. She literally gives you a worksheet for just about any money conversation you can have; and I think they are all useful tools.
What are we drinking?
Lori — a cabernet
Shannon — a dirty gin martini
- Both Shannon and Lori spent a period of time at Merrill Lynch.
- Lori believes the financial industry is very open to women now.
- She recently interviewed some senior-executive women from around the country to find out what their current challenges were and they discussed how women often prefer women advisors.
- Lori wrote The M Word after experiencing the challenge of having money conversations herself.
- The M Word Journal does 3 things:
- It helps to identify the information people are going to need for the money talk and helps them answer the questions they need to ask.
- It focuses on how to manage the psychological and emotional impact of the conversation, how to resolve conflict and how to get through it.
- It emphasizes the importance of having 3rd-party professionals.
- Lori thinks some typical reasons it is hard for families to have the money talk are:
- Cultural differences
- Gender differences
- Evolutionary instinctual
- Family history and money personality
- Money is at the core of everything we do and really guides most of our actions.
- Having the money talk is like learning a new language.
- Lori has a 5-step process for getting over having the money talk.
- Identify the transition point you are going through.
- Prepare the inner landscape.
- Prepare the outer landscape.
- Identify the people who need to be a part of the conversation.
- Create the process of having the money conversation that works for you.
- Both Shannon and Lori advise having the money conversation with an unbiased 3rd party which doesn’t necessarily have to be a financial advisor.
- TAKEAWAY: If you haven’t had the talk about money with your loved ones, there is no better time than the present!
Random Three Questions
- What is your favorite book to read?
- What is your favorite thing to do in your down time?
- What is a bucket list item for you?
Connect With Lori: